December 10, 2009

Johnny,

I came to visit you today. Your room was all moved around. I asked the nurse what happened and she said she had no idea but she really liked it. When I told mom later, she said she did it. Ha! I should have know. OCD...she doesn't think she has it...maybe a little! I fed you and in between each bite, you fell asleep. It took almost an hour to eat about a 1/2 cup of mashed potatoes and about 1/4 cup of diet coke. You did really good though, there was nothing when I suctioned you.

Dr. Thomas came by before I got there and took off your belly bandage and your back bandage. Everything to me looked really good. Your wound was dry and clean. He said that you didn't have to have a bandage on it anymore. He upped your pump too. I think that was why you were so sleepy.

I turned on Christmas music and wrote a note to mom while you slept. You woke up when I left and it was so hard to leave. I hugged you and I don't know where it came from but I started crying and you put your right hand on my left shoulder like you were consoling me. This really sucks Johnny! It really sucks!

I miss you! I love you! xo Jen